I Didn't Plan to be a Witch: and Other Surprises of a Joyful Mother

by Linda Eyre

I happened upon this title and thought it sounded like a fun and, most likely, insightful, read. The beginning of the book lived up to that somewhat, introducing lively anecdotes featuring the mischievous exploits of the author's nine children. By the middle of the book, however, I found myself getting mad and only made it through the rest of the book by sheer desire to finish what I had started, rolling my eyes all the way.
Having nine children does not automatically make someone eligible to dish out advice like some sort of expert. The author, indisputably, has the experience under her belt, but not necessarily the perspective I wanted to read about. I was greatly annoyed as the mention of her second home in Washington D.C. and her summer cabin in Oregon became regular side notes in every chapter. That, coupled with the humanitarian trips her family took to Romania and Japan, and the years they lived in England struck me as boastful; there are ways she could have related experiences without flaunting her checkbook. This book in itself appeared to be a marketing tool for her other five or six books which, sickeningly enough, are all about child rearing techniques, which makes me want to shout my initial statements, reiterating the thought that perhaps someone with nine kids is not qualified to teach others about raising children simply because they have a large family. The breaking point was the chapter about weight and her insistence that losing ten pounds in a year was a great struggle and bane and that her metabolism was obviously extremely slow. Want to know what I think about that lady? *&%$)*&^%$#@!!

I REALLY don't ever want to read anything by Linda Eyre again. Even her writing bothered me. The number of exclamation points in this book was staggering. The writing itself was redundant and her style added to my impression that she is no expert or professional. She bugs me. The book has nothing inappropriate in it except several instances of babies falling on their heads due to this moron having more kids than she can handle.